Withdrawn From Action, Our Hero Repents

Falge: Do you think the poor wheat harvest in Russia will have any effect on the taxi drivers?
Klamt: Easy-- Are We Not Men? and New Traditionalists and that live one on Ryko. What about you?
Falge: I dunno, cause I think, you know, it'll hit everyone where it counts. I mean, bread prices will go up, beer prices will go up, and on down the line...
Klamt: You're right, but the earlier stuff is definitely stronger. And all of the videos are fantastic. Did you see that Neil Young movie "Human Highway"?
Falge: ...and who needs a break more than the working man?

Engin Evin "Ah Dede, Vah Dede" (buy)

International Excuse Day 20

I bludgeoned your baby with a malfunctioning sledgehammer because I misheard you when you asked for the bananas.

Die Kreuzen "In School" (buy)

What? Smugglin' Donkeys In There?

I don't know dude-- your pants don't look too tight to me... What's the matter? Legs numb? Low sperm count? Rippin' seams? Got any worcestershire sauce?

Gene Moore "Eastbound Bus" (buy)

Beyond Pink

RUMOR CONFIRMED: All insurance companies are as much of a sham as all organized religions. So, relax and bend over.

Barbie "From The Jump" (buy)

You're Not Nuts! 12

40-9080 gas filler pipe grommets 33-34

Art of Flying "Drift Drift" (buy)

Stalled Before Pretend-Time

Sampling Larval Populations. Alfalfa weevil larval density was estimated every 10-15 d from late February until first alfalfa harvest (early to late May). Air conditioner manufacturers generally make rugged, high quality products. A subsample of 20 shakened stems was placed in a modified Berlese funnel to estimate the proportion of larvae remaining on stems after the bucket-shake method for each sample (Higgins et al. 1991). This proportion was added to the total larval density of each sample. So, the next time you see my face, hear one of my songs or even if I'm the topic of your next conversation, please remember that times are changing & so am I.

Gamelan Semar Pegulingan of Ketewei "Bopong" (buy)

Steamed Watch

Aw, c'mon, grandma, don't leave! We need you here! After all, you can't spell Grandmaster Flash without grandma!

Lucia Pamela "Walking on the Moon" (buy)

Some Days Are Enema Days

When I got back to the car, I was very surprised to find that all of my friends had morphed into little Jack Russell terriers. I guess I don't need to point out that they were yapping up a storm and jumping around like their tails were on fire! Huh. Weird.

Raymond Scott w/ Jim Henson "Limbo: The Organized Mind" {buy}

Did He Just Call Us Beavers?

From the Associated Press

LOS ANGELES, CA- Variety magazine is reporting that red-hot teen actresses Lindsay Lohan and Hilary Duff have signed on to play the crime-fighting, break-dancing ghosts of Thelma and Louise in the long-rumored sequel to the acclaimed 1991 movie of the same name. Actresses Geena Davis and Susan Sarandon were both nominated for Academy Awards in 1992 for their portrayals of the fiesty women in the original film. The sequel, purportedly titled Thelma and Louise Ride Again, is to be directed by Chris Columbus, best known for his work on Home Alone and the first two installments of the Harry Potter franchise.

In a prepared statement, director Columbus said, "I always found the first Thelma and Louise to be kind of a downer. I wanted to make something more fun, more kid-oriented." Ridley Scott, director of the original film, had no comment.

GA Girlz "Ragtop" {buy}

What Kind Of Example Is That For Rumer?

Then, this other time, I had a friend who was working as a PA on a movie starring Bruce Willis. I don't remember what it was called-- it was a total bomb. Anyway, my friend asked if I wanted to stop by the soundstage one day and just hang out and watch the 'magic in action'. I said sure, since I was going to be in the neighborhood anyway. (my salamander's veterinarian was near there) Of course, if you have ever been on a film set, you know that it looks like nothing is happening at all-- assistants with their radios chow down at the deli table while other assistants with radios and gaffer tape stroll back and forth as though they forgot to do something. My friend and I were standing off to the side chatting and drinking coffee when we saw Bruce Willis exit his trailer and stroll in the direction of catering. Suddenly, he put his arm up to his face and BLEW HIS NOSE ON HIS SLEEVE. Naturally, we were horrified and bug-eyed, but it didn't end there. He looked around briefly, and apparently thought no one was looking (or didn't care) and proceeded to EAT THE BOOGERS OFF HIS SLEEVE. I promptly said goodbye to my friend and went home, giggling and nauseated the entire way.

Luc Ferrari "Visages V- Part 2" {buy}

Hex Reducing Nipples

DEAR ASHLEE SIMPSON,

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LOVE, 2T&AC

Werner Müller und sein Orchester "Budenzauber Twist"

Garlic Banana Parfait

1 cup heavy cream
2 tablespoons granulated sugar
1 tablespoon vodka
1 package Fruit Stripe chewing gum
2 bananas
5 cloves garlic
soy sauce
1 can vienna sausages
capers

Crumble 3 sticks Fruit Stripe chewing gum. Combine cream, sugar and vodka and a dash soy sauce. Whip. Fold in chewing gum. Press garlic in garlic press and sautée in olive oil until golden brown. With a fork, mash together bananas and garlic in a bowl. In parfait glasses, alternate layers of vienna sausages, the cream mixture, and the garlic-banana mixture. Garnish with capers.

Serves 6

Buckner & Garcia "Do The Donkey Kong" *Buy*

Jokes Are Funny 8

Student: Imaginary clothes, Sir.

Molly O'Day "Poor Ellen Smith"
The Shelton Brothers "Aura Lee"

What Will You Gain If I Die Of Love?

The music scene in Ethiopia in the late 60s-early 70s was rich and fertile. There were many lively, vivid scenes and a wild variety of music flourished. The amazing Ethiopiques CD series has done a fantastic job documenting the music from this era that might otherwise has been lost to the ages. It seems a particularly brutal and opressive regime controlled Ethiopia beginning in 1974, and sought to eliminate night life and censor all artistic output, among other atrocities. Luckily for us, there were copious releases before 1974, many of which are of ridiculously high quality. Volume 8 of the Ethiopiques series focuses on the (mostly) soul releases of Amha Records between 1969-1974. The beautifully swinging song at the bottom of this post is from this volume. It is funky, relaxed, assured, has a great melody and a sparkling horn arrangement. The entire CD is just as good. In fact, the entire Ethiopiques series is incredible and you really can't go wrong with any of them.

Bahta Gébré-Heywét "Téssassatégn Eko"

Buy Ethiopiques Vol. 8- Swinging Addis CD here.

International Excuse Day 19

I covered all 53 examples of your beloved wild-game taxidermy (yes, even the white puma) with 77 gallons of MAGNACLEAR™ OC5900 Acrylic Urethane Clear Coat because my grandfather always wanted to be a Formula 1 driver, but could not due to his total lack of hands and feet.

Max Frost Says 14 Or Fight

WILD IN THE STREETS was a film that came out in 1968, and starred such strange bedfellows as Shelley Winters, Hal Holbrook, and Richard Pryor. If I recall correctly, it was about a rock star who decides to join up with a politician to focus on the "youth vote"-- that is to say, to get the voting age lowered to 14, and to have all retired people locked up, unable to vote. Anyway, it was a bit of a mess, and is very dated. The soundtrack is by the inimitable Les Baxter, so you know there will be something worthwhile therein. Most of the tracks are generic copies of popular late 60s hits. When I listen to the record, I often find myself thinking, "Who did this song originally?" Only to find it was, in fact, an "original". But, as I noted, there are a few worthwhile moments, and the track by Les Baxter's nom de plume, The Senators, is definitely worthwhile. It starts as a typical late 60s soundtrack tune-- slow, spare and a little bit, erm, sexy, but quickly reveals its true colors as odd loops, ghostly whoops and hollers, and keyboard warbles and squiggles come in from nowhere, and by the end is a truly psychedelic, heavily-delayed, pile of sound. As far as I can tell, the soundtrack has never been released on CD, (dig those crazy vinyl crackles, man!) and the movie has never been on DVD, but you can buy a VHS copy here.

The Senators "Psychedelic Senate"

Snacks + TV = Love

Sometimes the best things in life are also the cheapest. That was certainly the case when I discovered Gerty Farish in a bargain bin for only $1.95. Intrigued by the hand-screened cover of a crudely drawn, egg-shaped, cartoon bird and song titles such as "5-Time Banjo Champ", "The Two Sides of Bigfoot" and "Hey Seth, Why So Blue?" I decided to take the plunge. The band sounds like they might consist of an Atari 2600, a blender and a broken radio. This is pogo-on-your-bed-in-your-underoos-with-the-tv-blasting-white-noise-while-under-the-influence-of-a-serious-Pixie-Stix-bender music.

Gerty Farish "Hey Seth, Why So Blue?"
Gerty Farish "Kiki Riki"

Buy "Gerty Farish Bulks Up" CD here.