Wienered To The Post

Rudkin said on the Web site that he considered taping a flare to a cooking gas canister, "and trying to shoot his friend’s girlfriend Jaws style, but couldn’t find any tape or a flare." He took a long, tortured, gurgly breath, and continued, "Although I have no serious feelings for my friend, I sometimes hope that his girlfriend dies in surgery."

This was to be the last thing he ever said, for as the final syllable left his lips, the snake bite he had gotten earlier cut down his life tree to make way for the new, infinitely long ruination highway soon to be re-named in his honor.

Ernest Tubb “Too Old to Cut the Mustard” (buy)