Then there was this time when Sandra Bullock was at our house for a party. I don't know why she was there, she just was. Anyway, it was a really big party, and unfortunately, we only had one bathroom. Someone was in there for a long, long time. Finally the door opened and it was Sandra Bullock. She hurriedly grabbed her purse and left. The next person went in the bathroom, but only just got through the door when she yelled, "Oh, my god!" and also turned and ran. Nobody wanted to use the bathroom, so I had to go in and see what was up. The damage was unbelieveable! There must have been 10 pounds of crap in the toilet, and it smelled worse than a two-week old carcass. The toilet would not flush, naturally. We put on the rubber gloves and face masks and set out to removing the feces. When we had disposed of all the poop --by hand-- we saw the toilet was literally cracked from the force. We had to replace the toilet, and left the windows open for two weeks straight. We left a fan on 24 hours a day as an exhaust and lit incense and scented candles. We sprayed Lysol and other air fresheners and nothing would remove the stench. It took about a month before the Bullock scent had finally dissipated a little. All in all, we spent several hundred dollars fumigating, cleaning and replacing the toilet. (We also replaced all of the towels because we couldn't get the smell out)
The moral of this story is: don't let Sandra Bullock use your toilet under any circumstances.
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