tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63989372024-03-08T08:00:13.677+01:002 trombones and a crossbowthese are vile times; i blame your momterrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.comBlogger663125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-53073242226259589862011-04-13T00:49:00.015+02:002011-04-13T01:10:47.487+02:00A Much-Deserved Reduction Of The Church Porch<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/jwC1Bnr4yiA" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />This album is pounding with repetitive originality! Your generation cruises to victory but thankfully my generation slouches to moderation! There was not a single second while listening to this album when my son was not up and dancing with his hind-legs, signing off on the prerequisite (exciting) saucy synths with his right front leg and creating the world's first pure supergroup of British journalists with his left. For the entirety of the album, he was addicted to the band's slow-light strategy and spastic epiphotonics intrinsic to the album's first side in particular. So, in totality, we assign this album 2 out of 5 stars, in perpetuity, with rare exceptions, unnoted in this forum.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-64523175649970031552011-04-03T23:24:00.015+02:002011-04-03T23:51:32.402+02:00The Sucrose Beginnings Of Six Black Chemical Hungers<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/fBkvcQEGq9k" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />I blocked your accomplishments by first taking abysmal modern pop and combining it with your harsh remarks from early in the seminar. This caused an enhanced program delay involving as many as thirty factors, according to experts. Additionally, several attendees were treated for sitting injuries by introducing quality bacteria to their drinks. The final seminar of the weekend was surprisingly boring despite having a very catchy title ("The Ghost of Shit") and covering a wide variety of engrossing topics like saddle sores, subwoofers, and eyes that can be implanted in a human fetus and later harvested when the child becomes a teenager and used as a cooking substitute for real mint.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-90040748518042435872011-03-19T23:32:00.019+01:002011-04-03T23:19:56.951+02:00An Acute Attack On The Squeaking<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/B0Ikm7Egj68" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />This particular professor was known to have conducted some subtle experiments that reverberated backwards from the shadow of degenerate freeloaders, thus making all previous theorems obsolete and making hugely fundamental releases of neat ideas seem as though they were written by hacks with emotional problems. On occasion, the subtle experiments got to be so brutal and vile that they were no longer reverberating backwards from the shadow of degenerate freeloaders, but rather reverberating <span style="font-style:italic;">forwards</span> from a long profound glance at half a boy. So anyway, that's why many students avoided his courses, but I have actually forgotten your original question.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-59567515180584225162011-03-07T22:38:00.023+01:002011-03-07T23:10:40.415+01:00Multicellular Singing In Middle-Aged Environments<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="560" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/XSbZidsgMfw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />His body was shuddering under the weight of all those trinkets, his face turning a very pale shade of pale and his plaster trousers were beginning to crack around the knees. Among the trinkets, he had several "now mechanisms" including some tiny (and harmless) journey innovators and some even tinier business guys spewing the tiniest barf. I thought it was going to be entertaining to see what happened when he reached the point where the surface of several multi-colored light switches converged with the Earth, but alas, it came and went with no kind of conflict. Eventually, his mother arrived at the location at which she had deposited him, broke off the plaster pants into plaster cut-offs and helped him carry the trinkets home.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-12176900952032585622011-02-27T22:30:00.018+01:002011-02-27T22:56:40.684+01:00Swallowing Directions<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/EZX1GXeE4mg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />The Corporation has spent billions spraying the best diseases on the city and its surrounding areas, and now we have scores of little girls coming to us complaining of little twat sores. In an effort to deflect the bad PR, we have decided to begin pumping the best diseases instead into nice hot doughnuts, because everyone loves doughnuts, and if they don't they deserve diseases.<br /><br />Speaking of twat sores, I was appalled recently at the insanity of trying to get some action with the intern from Colombia and nothing being unzipped! I was questioning the health of her mentality attitude and her future at the Corporation when this dude suddenly lunged across the room and bulged against her nature. Since my slippers were padlocked to the desk, I instead transmitted two randomized debates inspired by one of my own childhood interviews about ramen noodles directly into his brain, causing him to cease bulging. Unziption is sure to follow such a heroic act.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-65388574597385263812011-02-20T22:14:00.020+01:002011-02-20T22:50:28.787+01:00Useful Seduction Methods Applied During Deeper Charming<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Smj78NAme9M" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />Some of the things I remember most about my first girlfriend are the lavish attention she pored over the yellow dye used in Jamaican military uniforms and her weird fetishes involving common buckeye butterflies. Oh, and now that she is on my mind, I also just remembered her miniature smock-frocks, on which she was always wiping blood of one sort or another. It is only now that I realize why that drawer always smelled so bad. One afternoon, when we had finished with our daily adult seismic fantastic romantic encounter, a random functioning male stranger suddenly appeared in our bedroom doorway and collapsed our innate sense of tiny electron propulsions (we both have it) by simply binding blossom devices together with a jazz-tinged flourish of the wrist. Naturally, we were spellbound, but knew that it was just a diversionary tactic and that we had to create thirteen unique gourmet sandwiches before the butt-ends of the tongues' journals hit the floor, or we would be eliminated. We forgot about the electrode we were supposed to avoid and pushed the section of the floor they said not to press, all of which created a falling/trapping scenario, and that was it for us-- we were forced to pack and leave the house immediately. And then she broke up with me.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-16306289879251573572011-02-14T22:50:00.013+01:002011-02-14T23:13:37.901+01:00When The Forehead Finally Hardens<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Zaokuk3oCEw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />"Energy Solo Fair this weekend!!!" screamed the handmade sign stapled to the cock of the corpse found in a dark alley by police officers earlier in the day. So it was decided right there and then: the entire family would attend the Energy Solo Fair, but first we needed to find the location. We covered the grandchildren in glitter and told them each to pose in a way indicating the possible candidate location. Adamaddict (the slow grandchild) immediately posed as the Amsterdam Anthropology Site, as we all knew he would. Oklawards, on the other hand, had had enough puzzle days to come up with something really helpful, but in the end posed as her paper funhouse and we could tell this was getting us nowhere. The adults decided to shove cheese in the children and perform experiments on the resulting headaches in the hopes that the children would hallucinate the correct location. Well, long story short, we never figured it out, so we just sat around the living room while Adamaddict performed a retarded rap approximation to the accompaniment of his cellular device. Honestly, I could have used a quick varnish irrigation at that point.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-27072840305872548612011-02-03T22:30:00.022+01:002011-02-28T00:31:58.913+01:00Compilation Of Fossilized Melodies<iframe title="YouTube video player" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/57PWqFowq-4" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br /><br />It has been my experience that married fruit comedy couples tend to do a lot of spite jokes. One would think that they had already been through so much hatred and pain in their own lives as married fruit that they would refrain from such spiteful attitudes, but apparently this is not the case. I once saw a brilliant set by a high-resolution, fearsome-looking councillor who was able to bring the house down without stooping to such "poets' pebbles," all the while demolishing prejudice-populated planets with witty observational intersections and bold, revealing glitter swoops between his breasts. Additionally, his act boldly encompassed a horizontal written-written dance, the likes of which the comedy world had never seen and will perhaps never see again. However, in fairness I must add that I actually saw his flesh again last year and honestly, it was a dreadful performance not even worthy of a consumptive wet nurse on a river-- with or without her skirt.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-41005515679542229542011-01-30T23:24:00.015+01:002011-01-31T00:07:44.562+01:00The Pillow Allegedly Used In The Bash-Attack<iframe title="YouTube video player" class="youtube-player" type="text/html" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/u4ZLkl15_d8" frameborder="0" allowFullScreen></iframe><br /><br />His huge rotting genitals were overflowing with spiders' legs, spilling all over his broken mother's broken heart-- and this at the breakfast table! Ever since he lost his job as manager of the chart-topping algae supergroup, Brain Sales, he spent all of his time searching for other parasites instead of feeding on himself. The pressure of coming up with "the next algae band" was just too much, it seems. At one point, he thought he had stumbled upon the next big thing when he discovered a way to musically control peptides, but the liquid writing heard on the first album, "Peptides Sing in the Experimental Thieves' Kitchen," all too quickly turned to biochemical degeneracy and auto-tune on the follow-up album, "Rock 'er Nice Vag." <br /><br />He collected the spiders' legs and went to his study where he wrote three story-songs for the next virtual newcomers, no matter who or what they would turn out to be.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-64739588736014141972011-01-25T21:32:00.024+01:002011-01-25T22:26:17.849+01:00Miserable Creature Finger And Strong Spring-Tide<iframe title="YouTube video player" class="youtube-player" type="text/html" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/fHvYoaP5Od4" frameborder="0" allowFullScreen></iframe><br /><br />"Innuendo, as we say in the business, is above commercial practicality and is only noteworthy for its recombinant peel proteins," the host of TVs Flamingo Fortune, Heather Alexander said as she leaned back in her daughter's womb, loudly powering up her new pitching bow and thus making it nearly impossible to continue the conversation. Despite the noise, I tried to titillate this track tissue tease with some tired chords and a few elderly improvement needles, but alas, twas not to be. The host of TVs Flamingo Fortune, Heather Alexander then mentioned something about solid modification on top of some veering beats provided by the Glossy Gurls DJ Team, who happen to be close friends of the host of TVs Flamingo Fortune, Heather Alexander and were hanging around spinning the other day, no shit. <br /><br />I had eventually had enough, gathered my laudable casing-systems on course development and stickered a three play way right out the door.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-38380936060743632522011-01-20T21:21:00.013+01:002011-01-20T21:59:17.981+01:00Piercing Devices Found To Shrink Selection Of Amateur Numbers Enthusiasts<iframe title="YouTube video player" class="youtube-player" type="text/html" width="425" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/2YrqmYv6Cog" frameborder="0" allowFullScreen></iframe><br /><br />That kind of supposed customer service just doesn't occur in photon lives-- just ask silicon, he hangs out with photons all the time. Me personally, I am unable to sustain wavelengths of a certain capability for any length of time. In fact, I believe that once your business begins keeping sophisticated records, you will see in retrospect that me quantities are well below those of all musical notes within the human hearing spectrum. <br /><br />Once I finally have the time to comb through the cohesive overview of your complete selection of baby belts, I will hopefully be able to begin work on a prototype keep-brain which enables extensive storage on multiple image circuits implanted in my parallel nuts.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-72022813803339189092011-01-15T21:48:00.002+01:002011-01-15T21:50:41.674+01:00Trish, It Breaks Our Hearts That You Are Gone<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/OqINetENovg?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/OqINetENovg?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />It hurts to even type it. We miss you dearly.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-24144984160855182612011-01-12T01:34:00.010+01:002011-01-12T01:56:55.329+01:00Describe Meaningful Holes<object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/UdHWQwBUY1A?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/UdHWQwBUY1A?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object><br /><br />Dr. Keathinger's disgusting knees research is akin to chubby lead soup according to several local experts. According to the spokesperson for the local chapter of SAFE Tweeners Squeak, the knees research amounts to little more than drooling material masquerading as a happily welcomed miscarriage. A self-heating despair sunset is planned for the next three days as a way of protesting the research. Despite all of this, several local toddlers' chewing was somewhat improved by the technology developed as a result of the knees research, according to non-local, impartial experts assigned to evaluate the case.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-42030903923027687372011-01-05T00:56:00.016+01:002011-01-05T01:44:49.767+01:00Stick No Unfounded Feet In Philosopher Soup<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/hT2kZOoV-MU?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/hT2kZOoV-MU?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x234900&color2=0x4e9e00" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />I was trying to cingulate a feet metaphor yesterday but kept choking on the large amount of anterior throat corral. My Heartbeat Community® keeps telling me that my throat corral is at most fuckity trivial, and at least equivalent to an unexpected fraction of the Chairman's Wiping Armies, each striving to thicken and expand beyond its zooplankton-esque confines. <br /><br />Yet another study has been reported to show that September was statistically very veal-heavy among all participants writing unfounded pop from skeletal lyrics who had not even pondered the whole bit about the magnetic album.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-67713752951973638862010-12-30T00:00:00.014+01:002010-12-30T00:49:09.034+01:00Satisfies Only Insects<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/YjeDRMOjIJk?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/YjeDRMOjIJk?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />It has been revealed that the performing flies' harmonicas are all unfortunately broken due to a bathroom mishap. As one might imagine, coming into possession of such a tiny harmonica is no small feat, much less 63 in the same key. At this time, we would like to request that the audience respectfully bow their heads in tender, thankful remembrance of those fleeting moments when every single one of the flies had a functioning harmonica.<br /><br />Thank you for your understanding.<br /><br />And now, in place of the performing flies, we proudly present the host of TVs The Name's the Same, Ray Goulding reading a blow-by-blow account of the time the cave we were in began to vomit glass auroras, giving it the dubious status of being the angriest of our geostationary-geomagnetic interactions.<br /><br />Hey Fiddles (or whatever your name is), why not trash Jersey?terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-22760104305589198202010-12-25T01:10:00.016+01:002010-12-25T01:32:39.132+01:00Three Bought Prestige, Giving Isolation<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/uZ2flAiQtdU?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/uZ2flAiQtdU?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Eight chick astronomers observed some astronomical shit lately, but no one cared because they're chicks. Some members of the news media were quick to observe that perhaps if the chick astronomers had been wearing science smocks rather than plunging, breezy spring numbers, their peers would have been less reluctant to confirm their findings. This reporter is quick to confirm that the other scientists would not have been faulted for coming down with a case of the "love stutters" in the presence of their giddy, laughing confirmations and their breezy spectrometry. <br /><br />It could also be noted in this forum that the favorite drink of many of the male scientists is a carbonated, really cold, gravy-flavored energy drink specifically marketed toward scientists called Baby Matrix; the by-product of an over-the-top study they concluded months earlier.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-52206189834965290932010-12-21T22:52:00.016+01:002010-12-21T23:22:26.401+01:00Landed Using A Combination Of Shame And Degradation<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/pmzPH2B9P3k?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x3a3a3a&color2=0x999999"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/pmzPH2B9P3k?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x3a3a3a&color2=0x999999" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />From: Management<br />To: Staff_All<br />Sent: Thu, December 32, 2010 5:12:48 AM<br />Subject: Work Crystals<br /><br />Attention employees: please remember to deposit your work crystals in the work crystal depository at the end of every work day. Anyone who fails to do this will have their wages withheld for 40 days and will clean all coffee machines in the complex during this time. Additionally, all plastic utterances must be held at the front desk for the entirety of every work day. Postdoctoral socialization must be conducted only at night or during scheduled breaks. Any extramural evidence found will be used in the prosecution of all cases involving ritual vocation coating and/or frequent biological stick-carrying. Furthermore, violators will be corralled and glittered- scheduling TBD by management.<br /><br />Please return to your company-mandated bulb study until further notice.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-13597764588617125572010-12-18T01:31:00.000+01:002010-12-18T01:32:52.679+01:00We Miss You Already<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/zAoPhVn4y1Q?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/zAoPhVn4y1Q?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Bye, Don.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-1231804811763602002010-12-15T00:13:00.016+01:002010-12-15T00:30:37.748+01:00X-Rays Of Heartbreak<object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/TBf0r7Vae2E?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/TBf0r7Vae2E?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object><br /><br />Diversity news: dried two-for-one think volcanoes can be found for less than half the price of half a pack of holiday fruit if one looks hard enough. <br /><br />In other news, a reliable source has decided to de-colon a Chicago-based teenaged fleece paraplegic for the value of his ubiquitous pantomime and, oh yeah, his fertile balls. However, a Chicago city official hastily declared the action offensive and put the plans temporarily on ice. He was quoted as saying, "Let Chinese gymnasts bounce and flail, but leave decisions about Chicago's fleece paraplegics to Chicago officials!" Many found his statement unobjectionable.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-34685089024332801182010-12-08T22:51:00.015+01:002010-12-08T23:30:36.851+01:00Neck And Waistcoat, Two Floating Brains<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/oavMtUWDBTM?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/oavMtUWDBTM?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />The host of TVs Brains & Brawn, Mark-Paul Gosselaar wrote some of the most exotic films ever to come out of Mexico while he was still unborn. His potential as a fetus was so great that while still in the womb, in addition to the exotic films, he also invented the floating rocks technique still used by magicians everywhere to this day. He also discovered poison light and used it to eliminate his mother the moment he slipped from her pussy. But it was not all exotic films, discoveries and potential; the host of TVs Brains & Brawn, Mark-Paul Gosselaar had quite a raw afternoon the day he passed an entire Jupiter-sized atmosphere through his urethra. The host of TVs Brains & Brawn, Mark-Paul Gosselaar held me sensitively for several seconds after that episode, let me tell you.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-35561699336927781372010-12-05T01:09:00.003+01:002010-12-05T01:12:35.464+01:00Violated Our Still Ions<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/l4_T5VYMHqc?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/l4_T5VYMHqc?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />If you, boy, interpose my man with any greater extent, you will meet my team of physicists who can find six astronomers within six physicists in a few discreet microseconds. So you best watch your actions-- especially in regard to whatever goes on in your little research-bitten spaceship. Previously, I measured abnormally high levels of a local compound known to cause interposition of men in this area, but have managed to keep those levels much lower since, no thanks to you. Let's just put it this way: if you, boy, do indeed interpose my man, the body previously known as "yours" will be seen in a 6-km-long reduction of fragments. And I don't mean <span style="font-style:italic;">locally</span>.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-62654119581989775072010-12-01T23:47:00.018+01:002010-12-02T00:45:56.490+01:00Swelling From Dollar Store Silicone<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ej_wRgBS5lI?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ej_wRgBS5lI?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Apple wine stains by the bed and behind his ears betrayed the perceived "extreme cleverness" claimed by his supporters. But no matter- hot doughnuts continued to be popped into my mother anyway. Eventually, they had his control panel; he stared at the wind. One day it was my turn to care for him. Mother was perched next to the hot doughnuts machine as usual, and I was saddled with the task of feeding Mr. M. I moved his mouth into his fork as the kitchen caught fire, determined to finish his meal. As the concrete turned to jiffy pop, we peeked over the rim of the smoldering crater from our precarious viewpoint. Mr. Mushrooms finally swallowed the last mushy glob of something or other as we were swallowed by the charred ground itself.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-85617677463266753852010-11-27T21:56:00.018+01:002010-11-27T22:14:55.110+01:00Instead Of My Bone-Hungry Landlord<object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Iqn2QMD3ZSE?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Iqn2QMD3ZSE?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object><br /><br />Please get me something I actually want for my birthday: colorful smoke, anything. As it is, my finer birthday memories to this point have all come courtesy the Weather Channel. Besides colorful smoke, I would also be interested in any of the various kinds of rough movement, e.g., kayaking through rapids, aggressive car racing, sexual intercourse with other humans and/or farm animals, random dialing with a wan smile, entering vouchered museum specimens into databases, etc. I do like quaint little fur hats, but please don't get me another one; my tastes are <span style="font-style:italic;">very specific</span>.<br /><br />With licorice shadows laying silent licks on the telecasters, the smiles of the band members reminded several in the audience of petite spaghetti in crayola colors.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-10622352695411721192010-11-22T23:14:00.017+01:002010-11-22T23:52:17.093+01:00Didn't Wash The Forest Away With Blasts Of Moist Sugar<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/JT186GwWzRg?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/JT186GwWzRg?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0xe1600f&color2=0xfebd01" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Woefully fizz-like winos' piss adds a strangely profound scent to modern greeting cards in a way that brings together human rights organizations, philanthropists and corporate leaders in their mutual admiration of what is generally regarded by historians to be one of the most important developments in world history since Blackbeard was killed off the coast of North Carolina on this day in 1718. <br /><br />With a startling gush of metaphysics, I had a square, stout, dark person standing before me, soon to be torn by my friend with refracted communication and, later, to be celebrated with utter amazement.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6398937.post-54290810816036674862010-11-18T22:55:00.016+01:002010-11-19T00:08:44.144+01:00Active In Traditional Wedding, Baptism And Funeral Ceremonies<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/IJFHS9RY8Bw?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/IJFHS9RY8Bw?fs=1&hl=en_US&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />When he sings, his left cheek droops in a mercilessly, awkwardly sad manner and sits humped for what feels like an eternity-length yawn. In fact, his sounds sound like a tangle of omnichromatic foil laminate, molybdenum, and honestly, not real if you ask me. The members of his loyal audience have contemplated the years spent pretending that the presented flowers were far from the water, when they were in fact long since drowned, if you catch my drift. Near the end of his most recent performance, a horrible young lady came bursting in and compared his singing to reading and/or writing a big dumb book, and then began to tear him viciously with her ragged fingernails. I suggested providing Humanist alternatives to the vicious fingernail tearing, but <span style="font-style:italic;">that</span> never happened.<br /><br />Courageux Joe needs to be fed now.terrifiedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17690104763519612922noreply@blogger.com0